The 3 F’s That Make Her Wanna F You

2013-01-05 17.14.34Flowers, Fabrics and Flames. If you want to seduce a woman, you must have these three things in your home and/or on your person at all times.

Flowers: Always keep a bouquet of fresh flowers on your dining, coffee and/or bedside table, and always send or bring flowers for special occasions. And if you’re in a bar, restaurant or piazza and there’s a sketchy gypsy going from table to table selling flowers, BUY HER A FUCKING FLOWER!

He bought a Flower in the piazza, so I F'd him in the fountain.

He bought a Flower in the piazza, so I F’d him in the fountain.

Fabrics: Always dress elegantly and wear clothing she wants to touch with her fingers and/or feel against her bare breasts. If you don’t know how to dress, schedule a shopping session with me. Cover your gross couch and uninspiring office equipment with gorgeous fabrics. Having amazing linens on your bed will make her wanna F you in your bed, so invest in quality sheets and MAKE YOUR FUCKING BED!

Flames: Always light several candles the second you walk in the door. Get assorted sizes of candles and use empty wine bottles as candle holders for long tapers. #chic. Always carry a badass lighter so you can light a woman’s cigarette before some douche beats you to it. Women love candles and women love gentlemen. So, buy lots of candles and BE A FUCKING GENTLEMAN!

Buy the 3 Fs today and you will get Fd tonight.

He bought the Fabric in the morning and got Fd all night long.

He bought the Fabric in the morning and got Fd all night long.

The 9 Habits Of Highly Fuckable People- #9

Habit # 9- You Must Own Your Sexuality

Do not waste the best years of your life being orgasmically deprived and sexually unfulfilled because of what your friends, your family, your church or your government thinks is “right”. Never be afraid to examine your values and explore your sexuality until you find what makes YOU happy, in and out of bed.

If you want to try crazy things with complete strangers, then DO IT. If you want to try being gay, bi-sexual, transsexual, pansexual, polyamorous, queer or kinky, then DO IT. If you want to try bondage, discipline, domination, submission, sadism, or masochism, then DO IT. If you want to try monogamy (as long as it’s consensual), then DO IT. If you want to stay a virgin until you are married, then DO IT. If you want to leave your sexually unfulfilling marriage, then DO IT.

You don't know if you're into toe-sucking until you've had your toes sucked.

You don’t know if you’re into toe-sucking until you’ve had your toes sucked.

You only get ONE BODY and you only get ONE LIFE. It belongs to you and nobody else. So, take a moment and ask yourself: “What kind of sociosexual life do I want?”

It’s now or never. Tomorrow your genitals could turn to dust. Take time to figure out exactly what you want and need, in and out of bed.  Communicate your needs and wants without fear of judgement or rejection. If someone isn’t willing to give you what you want and need, wish them well, and move on.

There are a lot of beautiful people in this world. A lot of beautiful people who want to give you love and sex and Mind Blowing Orgasms. As long as you fearlessly explore and articulate your needs and desires, while respecting your partners and following The 9 Habits of Highly Fuckable People, you WILL become The One everyone wants, and you will Never Sleep Alone.

You must explore until you find what works for you.

You must explore until you find what works for you.

Unless you want to.

Be brave.

Be beautiful.

And know that I am always here for you. I will help you if you need help.  Whether you live in a progressive city, an ass-backwards town, a tiny village, or a remote island — If you write to me, I will connect you with the resources you need to help you live the life you always wanted.

Wherever there is sociosexual suffering or orgasmic injustice, I'll be there...

Wherever there’s sociosexual suffering or orgasmic injustice, I’ll be there…

Buy A Red Dress


When The Woman In The Red Dress enters the room, all eyes are on her. Everyone wants to know her, everyone wants to be her, and everyone wants to sleep with her.

When a woman puts on a red dress, she instantly becomes FIRE.





And those are the four most attractive qualities in a human being. If you’re a woman, buy at least one red dress and wear it as often as possible. If you are a man, buy the woman you admire a red dress. Put it in a gorgeous box, wrap it in beautiful paper with a satin ribbon and either have it delivered to her home, or leave it on her bed. There are many exquisite red dresses that are one-size-fits-most, such as this one HERE.

The Woman In The Red Dress Never Sleeps Alone.  IMG_1384_2

Unless she wants to.

And the man who gives a woman a red dress always sleeps with The Woman In The Red Dress.

Find your perfect shade of red HERE.

Top 5 Places To Find A Hot Date- NYC


Below are my Top 5 Places to meet hot and adventurous single people who are actively looking for their next hot romance.

1. Never Sleep Alone at Joe’s Pub On Saturday January 17, 2015 at 9:30pm- As an alternative to lame-ass speed-dating or desperate Tindering, come to my monthly show and party at Joe’s Pub. 200 hot and horny singles under one roof, drinking, laughing, singing along to pop songs backed by a live band and participating in onstage blind dates and demonstrations. If you sit up front at a communal SINGLES table, you are guaranteed to make out with some strangers. Timid people should watch from the “VOYEURS” section in the back. Everyone mingles throughout the show and afterwards, we go to a nearby club to meet even more hot peeps. If you’re single and seeking, NSA is the place to be.  Get tickets HERE.

Find someone to kiss under the mistletoe at NSA this Saturday. Joe's Pub, NYC

Find someone to kiss under the mistletoe at NSA this Saturday. Joe’s Pub, NYC

2. Duck’s Eatery- This awesome East Village bar and restaurant has a sweet and sexy staff that makes everyone feel at home and is always filled with single locals and travellers of all ages. There’s live music on Wednesday, so come before 10pm if you want to grab a seat. I recommend coming alone, bringing an interesting book or sketchpad and enjoying a meal at the bar. Within 10 minutes you will find yourself involved in a lively conversation.

3. Employees Only- Not only does this place have the sexiest atmosphere and the best cocktails in the city, it also has the best-looking and most outgoing singles scene I have ever encountered at an NYC bar. It is a small and very popular place, so I recommend making a dinner reservation to ensure you get in. The food is excellent. Come early for dinner and stay late to meet your dream date.

The NSA After Party at one of my favorite hotspots.

The NSA After Party at one of my favorite hotspots.

4. Hostels- If you’re single and looking to hook up, why not book yourself at a little staycation at one of NYC’s chic and lively hostels? The people who stay in youth hostels are single and adventurous young men and women from other countries who just want to meet nice locals, be taken to “real places” and “have an authentic experience”. YOU are a nice local. “Real places” means a falafel place followed by your apartment. “Have an authentic experience” means they want to give and receive as many Mind Blowing Orgasms as possible before they have to catch their flight home.

Having An Authentic Experience

Having An Authentic Experience

5. Free Fridays at MOMA- Admission is free at The Museum of Modern Art from 4-8pm on Friday nights and there are always tons of single people checking out the latest exhibits and hoping to find a cultured fuck-buddy. Strike up a conversation while looking at the same painting and ask them to join you for an after-art drink and/or MBO.

I look forward to seeing you all on Saturday night at Joe’s Pub.  Dress to impress, and do come say hello to me at the after-party. Order my book today, send the receipt to and you can join me and my friends at my VIP table…

Get my book by clicking HERE.

I prefer Interactive Exhibits

I prefer Interactive Exhibits



The 9 Habits Of Highly Fuckable People- #8

IMG_4959 Habit #8 You Must Know How To Hold Your Liquor

Nobody wants to sleep with a gross drunk. Too much alcohol causes bad breath, bad behavior and whisky dick. Alcohol CAN be a great social lubricant, but you’d better know your limits, and stay well within them if you want people to want you. Drunk people are annoying at best and dangerous at worst. You do not want to be one of them.  To avoid getting too drunk and rendering yourself unfuckable, I highly suggest adhering to the following guidelines when you are out drinking among sexually relevant people.

1. Don’t drink more than 5 drinks in one night. Drink slowly.

2. Don’t do shots.

3. Drink a full glass of water between each drink. Better yet, each time you go to the bathroom, drink 20 hand fulls of water, then look in the mirror and ask yourself: “Do I look shit-faced right now?”

4. Watch old people. If you’re acting like them –forgetting things, stumbling around, pushing on doors that clearly say “PULL”, yelling like a deaf person, getting cranky and belligerent for no reason, and/or farting or peeing your pants a little– it’s time to stop drinking and go the hell home.

Remember: Sober is sexy. Tipsy is cute. Drunk is sad. 

Keep it classy. Sip it slowly.

Keep it classy. Sip it slowly.

The 9 Habits of Highly Fuckable People #7

2014-06-06 09.44.50

 Habit #7- You Must Exercise Every Day

Exercise means that you exert your body in a focused manner for an extended period of time. Yes, it is difficult. If it is not difficult, it is not exercise. And, if you do not exercise consistently and constantly challenge yourself to get to the next level of fitness, you will not achieve the maximum benefits and you will never become The One everyone wants.  You must make the time to exercise and you must exercise as often as possible, preferably every day.

Begin with a small commitment of ten minutes a day, three days a week. It will make an immediate positive difference to your physical appearance and mental state. You may not see it or feel it at first, but other people will. And very soon, you will too. Once you have kept that commitment for one week, gradually increase your commitment. Eventually, you want to get to the point where you are exercising for an hour a day, every day.

You must do it.

And don't eat gross stupid food either! If it doesn't make you feel sexy, DON'T PUT IT IN YOUR MOUTH!

And don’t eat gross  food either! If it doesn’t make you feel sexy, DON’T PUT IT IN YOUR MOUTH!

I don’t care if you were blessed with a perfect body. Regardless of age, weight, or body type, every person on earth should strive to exercise for one hour every day. Exercise is not about vanity. Regular exercise is essential to your health and it is essential to being a fearless, relaxed and seductive person. You will find that on the days you make yourself exercise for one hour, the other hours of the day are spent feeling incredibly powerful, extremely relaxed, and undeniably sexy. You will also find that once you begin exercising regularly, your MBOs become much more intense. With regular exercise, everything looks better, everything sounds better, everything smells better, tastes better, everything feels better, everything IS better.

MBO = Mind Blowing Orgasm

We wer

We were all able to enjoy the amazing food, drink and MBOs at the NSA Dinner Party last night because we all worked out for an hour beforehand.

I promise to help you get started with an exercise program. Regardless, of your age, weight, or income, you CAN maintain a regular exercise schedule. If I can make time in between having MBOs, throwing parties, writing books and getting the world laid to exercise, so can you. Don’t be just another lazy and unfuckable member of the mediocre majority. Take the first step towards becoming the you you’ve always wanted to be and write to me at  so we can work together to make it happen.

If you’d like to be invited to the next NSA Dinner Party, order my book from any of the online retailers by clicking HERE and/or get tickets to the next Joe’s Pub show by clicking HERE, email me the receipt and you will be invited to future NSA Insider events.

I really want you to come.

I'm so blessed to have so many beautiful, powerful and fuckable single people in my life!

I’m so blessed to have so many beautiful, powerful and fuckable single people in my life! Thanks Chef Ziggy at The Iron Horse, NYC for hosting us and cooking us an amazing meal!

The 9 Habits Of Highly Fuckable People #6

IMG_0735-57-57 Habit #6: You Must Create Something Every Day

All human beings have an inherent internal need to create. Most people are too lazy or too scared to bring their creative ideas to fruition. And it is the denial and suppression of the personal creative urge that makes people become unhealthily obsessed with other human beings. You are an artist. You have many creative ideas in your head, from trying a new recipe, to writing a novel, to painting your bathroom wall. Your past obsessions with other human beings were simply your inherent creative need having no other outlet. Therefore in order to become confident, fulfilled, and supremely attractive to everyone you meet, you must begin to actively work on these ideas and make daily creation your top priority.

I love to create new recipes.

I love to create new recipes.

You must paint the wall, take the acting class, learn the guitar, cook the homemade pasta, write the epic poem, make the pornographic sock puppets– Whatever creative idea you have in your head. You must make it your first priority to dedicate as much time as possible every day in bringing that creative idea to life. Even if you can only devote ten minutes a day to working on your creations, it is essential that you make the time to do it. Constant creation will cause you to never become unhealthily obsessed with anyone or anything but yourself and the world you are constantly creating.

Do this, and you will Never Sleep Alone.

Unless you want to.

Even if I'm in love or on vacation, I ALWAYS take time alone to work on my new book every day. Daily creation makes your MBOs stronger.

Even if I’m in love or on vacation with someone, I ALWAYS take time alone to work on my new book every day. Daily creation makes your MBOs stronger.

The 9 Habits of Highly Fuckable People- #5


You become what you do. If you actually DO what I tell you, you will become The One everyone wants and you will love every second of your precious life. If you DON’T take active steps towards transforming yourself, you will stay lonely and desperate, becoming older and unhappier with every passing year until you die with The Look of Expectation on your face and decompose into a pile of unfuckable dust.

And now, I give you… Continue reading

The 9 Habits Of Highly Fuckable People- #4

IMG_2498Fuckability has very little to do with your looks, age, or income level. It has everything to do with your habits. If you actually DO the things I tell you to do, everyone will want to do YOU. You don’t have to sleep with everyone. But everyone is going to want to sleep with you. And when everyone wants to sleep with you, you have the power to get whatever you want.

Read my other blog postings and buy my book HERE to learn more about The 9 Habits of Highly Fuckable People. But, today, I give you:

See the world. Find yourself.

See the world. Find yourself.

Habit #4: You Must Travel Internationally

And you must travel alone. Solo international travel is essential to being an exceptional individual whom everyone wants to sleep with. You must strive to go on at least two international trips a year, and you must leave your hometown and visit one new place in your own country at least once a month. Travel is cheaper and easier than you think. Click HERE to learn how to obtain everything you need to make your NSA Travel dreams come true. I provide all the links and all the information. Get it done!

And if you pre-order my book by midnight tonight from any of the online retailers listed HERE and email me the receipt to, you will BE ENTERED TO WIN AN ALL-EXPENSES PAID TRIP TO NAPOLI, ITALY AND THE AMALFI COAST. 

I'd love to get you. On a slow boat to Procida...

I’d love to get you. On a slow boat to Procida…

I want you to close your eyes and visualize a romantic and exotic foreign country that you have always wanted to visit. In what faraway land do you see yourself looking beautiful and powerful, feeling euphorically happy and truly alive, experiencing new sights, smells, sounds, tastes and textures, while eating the most delicious meals of your life, partying with the locals late into the night, taking up temporary residence in an architectural masterpiece and making passionate love to a magnificent stranger as the dawn breaks over the horizon?

The view from my (outdoor) bed in Napoli.

The view from my (outdoor) bed in Napoli.

Then I want you to get dressed in an outfit that makes you feel wonderful when you look in the mirror. Then, I want you to go to a bookstore alone and buy a travel guide for that magical place you have never been.

Take your new travel book, a pen and a notebook to a lively SocioSexual Watering Hole that serves delicious food. Do not invite any of your friends to meet you. Take a seat at the bar, turn off your phone and enjoy a long and leisurely meal alone while you read your travel book and begin planning your dream trip.

Partying with the locals

Partying with the locals

You will be going on this trip by yourself within the next six months. Don’t worry if you don’t have the money yet or if you think it will be difficult to take time off. Stop making excuses and start making an itinerary. You will find that once you begin clearly articulating your desires and creating a step-by-step plan, everything and everyone around you will conspire to make your fantasy a reality.

If anyone at the SocioSexual Watering Hole asks you what you are doing, say: “I’m planning a trip to ________________.” If they ask you why you are going to this amazing location all by yourself, smile and say: “Because I want to.”

Because I want to.

Because I want to.