NO PLASTIC- Plastic plates are for pre-schools and insane asylums. Real plates, real glasses, real orgasms. No depressing soccer mom insulated totes either. Use something sexy like THIS.
A BRIGHT BLAKET- Nothing itchy, faded, stained or with childish patterns. You don’t want people thinking of dying grandparents or wetting the bed at nap time. Invest in a sensual picnic cloth with an exotic pattern that transports you to another world. In my experience, Mandalas get you laid.
WINE- No Chateau Diana, damn it! Learn what’s great. And if you’re having a beach picnic, keep your wine cool by burying it in wet sand near the waves. Just keep an eye on it. Bring an extra bottle hidden in a chic shoulder bag to surprise and delight your date when they think you’ve run out. Don’t forget a wine opener!
Images by Alfredo Guenzani
CANDLES- Are a MUST for a night picnic. Get at least 6 pretty yet inexpensive tea-light lanterns like these so the wind doesn’t blow them out and you don’t start a fire. You are 10 times more likely to get laid during a nighttime picnic than a daytime picnic, so start at dusk and fuck til dawn.
MUSIC- Have a good playlist or PandoraOne ready to go and a portable blue-tooth speaker dock like this one from Bose. If using Pandora or another music service, be sure to spend the $4.99 a month to be commercial free. Nothing ruins a Mind Blowing Orgasm like a goddamn commercial.
MENU- Sexy, light, colorful ADULT foods only! No burritos, McDonald’s, Capri Suns or Doritos! You can do a simple greek salad with focaccia, a cheese board, sushi, or a mezze plate with different spreads and olives. Get creative and keep it classy and light. Sexual desire comes from hunger. If you fill your date with food they ain’t gonna wanna have dinner down under.
Have fun, Fuckables.
An send me photos.