Random hookups don’t have to be gross. With a little prep, a lot of passion and even more COMPASSION, sex with a complete stranger can be an opportunity for self-discovery, euphoric pleasure, and true human connection.
1. Be Prepared: When you go out at night, always carry your NSA Hookup Kit: Clean underwear, toothbrush, emergency cash, condoms, candle, passport (ya never know:), contact solution if you need it- everything you will need to be comfortable should you end up going home (or abroad) with a sexy stranger.
2. Be Safe: If you are going to someone’s house or they are coming to yours, ask to see their ID first. Make mutual google-stalking and social media investigation a fun thing you do together over a drink at the bar, so you both know WHO you are about to share a bed with. Call a friend of yours and say: I am going home with Mr./Miss/Mrs./Dr. (Fill in complete name). And, for Christ’s sake: USE CONDOMS!
3. Be a Good Host: If they are coming to your house, treat them like an honored guest, not some cheap piece of ass. Light candles, turn on music, offer them something to drink. Be considerate, be compassionate and be SENSUAL. If it’s your house, it’s your job to make your PEEP feel at home. If they stay super late, help them arrange safe transportation home. If they sleep over, offer them coffee/tea and a shower in the morning. Don’t be an awkward asshole.
4. Be a Good Guest: Be considerate of your host’s space and the fact that he/she/v may have to work in the morning. If you do spend the night, in the morning, get the hell out of their bed and get back to YOUR life, rather than waiting around for the forced brunch invite. Leave your phone number if you’re into them. If they’re into you, they’ll call you. If they’re not, they won’t. And you will move on with your life without shame or regret. Don’t be a clingy psycho.
5. Be In The Moment: You are naked with another human being. Focus on getting the most out of the present rather than stressing about the future. Explore each other’s bodies, be a generous and compassionate lover, communicating your sexual needs and desires, and encouraging your partner to share theirs. You’re in this thing together. Never forget that you are beautiful, never forget that your partner is beautiful, and never forget that sex is beautiful. And never forget that every time you have sex…it could be the last time.